Holed up in White River Junction
Wednesday, March 3, 1999
Late Evening, 10:59 P.M.
It has been raining out for most of the night so far. While my bones are aching, the rain is otherwise comforting to me. I am tucked away in room 24 of the
Super 8 Motel in White River Junction (WRJ). I have settled in here for a couple of nights in an attempt to sort things out and to chill out a little, at least for the time being anyway.
I called *Abe* earlier in the evening. It is a good thing that I did too. I had a lengthy talk with him and feel somewhat better from it. Abe mentioned that he had checked with the
Vermont Disability Determination Services (DDS) office about my situation. He seems to believe that VT DDS may be able to reopen and review my case on their end, without my needing to appeal their decision. I hope that it works out, though it could take a long time for that to happen.
It is hard to know if things are really as Abe says they are or if he is baiting me: as he have often done to others and me, as well; when he is trying to bring things together around. He will often manipulate the person he says he is trying to help. I believe he knows I am very serious about this. I just hope he is clear about my terms and that he understands what I know I need to move on with this. Of course, he has not always gotten it before either. He has played the same power and head games repeatedly with people, though on occasion it can work out otherwise.
I guess time will tell what unfolds. - 11:26 P.M.
Note:
This Section Was Added to the Above Post
on Monday, February 3, 2003
to Provide the Following Information
Concerning this Retro-Blog
What Led Up to the Creation
of a Retro-Blog
Edition of Norsehorse's Home Turf
In an earlier blog post on
Norsehorse's Home Turf entitled 'Deep & Dire Reflections' (Friday, January 17, 2003), I posted an older co-written column from back in 1999 entitled
The Journey of dis-Ability: Reflections on How Income Can Benefit Outcomes [click here to read], formerly published in
The Independent: A Vermont publication for seniors and people with disabilities.
In a strange twist of coincidence at the time, the exact day that the February-March 1999 edition (Volume 8, Number 1) of
The Independent hits the streets, which the column was published within, received in the afternoon mail was a notice of termination of my disability benefits.
The notice generally stated that they decided I no qualified for disability benefits. It either came from the
Social Security Administration (SSA) or the
Vermont Disability Determination Services (DDS).
While I had been extremely concerned and stressed out earlier about my possible fate, getting that termination notice pushed me right over the edge in a hurry.
In one fell swoop,
serious and persistent agitation, panic, anxiety, tension, loss of sleep, major depression and other forms of painful distress and dis-ease was showing itself in me on a regular basis in a way and to a degree, the like of which had not arisen or been as visible or constant as had been the case in the few years before then.
Previous Journalizing
Earlier the same year (or later in the year prior [1998]), due to much of the networking and activism work I had done over the years, I had been donated an old laptop computer by a non-profit human services advocacy organization.
The laptop computer was far too out-dated and slow to continue to properly fulfill the needs and uses of the organization that it had come from. However it fit my needs entirely.
Having my own personal laptop computer was richly empowering. Utilizing this excellent writing tool, I began keeping an journal once again.
Never knowing how long the old laptop computer would keep functioning, I made sure to save everything on duplicate diskettes and also printed out much of what I wrote when I had access to a computer with a printer.
Dungeon Storage
For about three years now however, due to a variety of reasons, that old laptop had been sitting in a locked trunk of mine. The trunk is very much securely and dryly stored away in what is a cold and damp cellar (basement).
Last Thursday (January 30, 2003) I went down into that chilly cellar to open up the trunk in order to get some extra blank diskettes for someone to use with their new digital camera.
Brief detour:
To view the digital picture taken last Thursday of the exterior of
Another Way's building and posted on our online group homepage, check out the
Another Way Cyberspace Drop-In Center [click here].
Back on subject:
While going through the things in my trunk, I decided to not only bring up the diskettes, but brought up the entire carrying case they were in, which of course contains my laptop computer too.
As I vaguely recall, I may have had some trouble with it in late 1999 and that is why it sat there so long, I cannot remember the details though. Plus, in its carrying case with everything it comes with, etc., the laptop is a bit heavy and bulky to carry around or keep safe, especially when one is homeless.
During a period when I was still having to camp out at times or scurry around much more for a place to stay and sleep at night when possible, than is the case these days, it finally got put in storage and was only freed from its dungeon late last week.
Knowing enough not to plug it in right away yet, since it needs to become acclimated to room temperature again, I waited until Friday (January 31, 2003) evening to plug it in to see if it is still functioning in any workable regard. When I finally turned it on, it worked and fine. There appear to no problems with it so far as I can tell.
Which brings me to the introduction of my newly created retro-blog.
Introducing Norsehorse's Home Turf Retro-Blog
When I went through the carrying case of my laptop computer this last Thursday (January 30, 2003), since I had long forgotten about them, much to my surprise I found the printed copies of my old journal entries. They were kept in perfect condition.
Thus begins the
retro-blog edition of
Norsehorse's Home Turf.
As a retro-blog, those posts found on
Norsehorse's Home Turf Retro-Blog are solely from my prior journalizing efforts. They represent an online publication of transcribed hard copies of private journal entries, not previously shared with others in any form.
In certain cases the journal entries have been edited for publication on the retro-blog in order to protect the identities, privacy and dignity of others mentioned in what had otherwise been a private journal.
This is a work in progress of course. I may change the format and adjust the editing process to make the transcribed entries more readable than may now be the case.
Journal entries currently in the process of being transcribed and blogged are from the time period of 1999, which began after I left
Montpelier and landed for a little while in
White River Junction, Vermont after having taken a
Vermont Transit Lines bus that far.
As "imported" computer disks are not allowed to be used on most of the public access computers I am using these days, I am having to transcribe from the printed copies my journal entries instead.
My intention is to transcribe and post up as much and as soon as possible. It may end up taking me a while to get them all posted. In addition, I will be editing for mistakes and typos when located as well.
Just like
Norsehorse's Home Turf blog has grown and will continue to evolve, this retro-blog edition will as well as time, energy, online access and creativity allow.
